Dear Sassy,

“Are there silent rules while shopping with girlfriends? Who gets dibs on what? Isn’t is whomever finds it first? I have been eyeing a coat since LAST winter. I told my friend about the coat and I took her to the store with me because I needed a second opinion and she wanted to shop.”

“Next thing I know, she’s all up in my coat and now has intentions of buying it. Note, there were tons of other black coats besides the one I was eyeing. To make matters worse my friend is also my roommate, the probability of us wearing the same coat on the same day is high and it is extremely cold where I live. This isn’t the first time she has done this, she tends to buy the same exact things that I buy. Help! My friend is starting to cramp my style!”

Signed,

Style for Style

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Dear Style for Style,

Since you grabbed the coat first you technically have first dibs. Your friend violated the rule of first dibs, no one likes a double dibber nor a dibs stealer.

I personally would not take it too offensively, after all imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. Your friend may look up to you as a creative fashionista and is trying to emulate you. Bottom line she jocks your style.

You asked her to go shopping with you to be a style consultant, not a style stealer. Even though you were at a store, with many other black coats to chose from, she chose your’s and stole it from right under you nose. Did this incident, did it make you wonder if she would steal a man you are interested in? This could be why you are frustrated and disappointed with her.

Since the coat incident was not an isolated problem, I suggest finding another shopping buddy. Unless you don’t mind being her style muse.

Love,

Sassy

*PS: The only time I would EVER modify the first dibs rule is if I was at a sample sale with friends (since sizes and cuts can be limited). If I try something on and it doesn’t fit me right, I will pass it to my friend. No point in wasting a perfectly cute outfit… Especially, if it does not fit me and it is more her style. Yes, another woman’s trash could be another woman’s treasure.

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I Saw It First!

So, what happens when the object at hand is not a coat, but a female or male? Who gets first dibs? Is it the guy that saw the girl first? Or is it a free for all? Is it ok to try him on first to see if it fits?… If it’s your style? What if you commit to getting a number and it doesn’t fit well? Would you and could you pass him off to your girlfriend? Would you hoard everything like it ain’t going out of style? Would you steal him from your friend?